Gratitude: Prayer Warriors...

Whew-we, Sunday.  You, precious day, are exhausting.

Anyone else feel that way? 

I never, never, never felt that before kiddos.  It was super easy and super relaxing when all we were responsible for was ourselves.  

Now getting all four of us up, fed, dressed, diaper bags packed, don't forget Spots and out the door in time to drive the THREE WHOLE MINUTES to church is a huge undertaking.

Honestly, if there were a sidewalk all the way to church, it might just be easier to walk.  

Unless it was raining.

Our small group meets Sunday afternoons at 4:30 pm.  Between coming home from morning church and nap time is a rush to wear the toddler out enough for her to go down for a nap early so she can wake up early and be in a good mood about it.

Ask me how often that happens.

We get home between 6:15 and 6:30 pm from small group.  Both kids are absolutely exhausted.  That means Aubrey Kate is bouncing off the walls and Rhys is either conked out in the swing or all out crying.  

I wised up a few weeks ago and stopped attempting to cook Sunday nights.  Now I cook a lunch and either we eat leftovers for dinner or I throw dinner in the crock pot when I'm cooking lunch.  Eliminating the cooking dinner process has been helpful.  

Chris and I absolutely crash once we manage to get both kids down for the night.  

Crash.

Here's the best part:  I love it.  

We're a family.  Livin' life.  Smack in the middle of the sloppiness, exhausting, nap-time-for-all...life.

Somewhere in all of the mess, I realized my feelings about being home full time have changed.  

Everyone but me took a nap this afternoon and in the quiet, I got to thinking about how much my life has changed.  

1.  I now wear a ponytail most every day.  Homeboy likes to pull it otherwise.  And that hurts.  Or, if I'm really lucky, he'll spit up and when my hair is down...yeah.

2.  Last week, I got two Target gift cards thanks to the purchase of massive boxes of diapers.  I had a whole stack of coupons for those two boxes of diapers so with the gift cards, it was a pretty good deal.  I bought the diapers in one transaction and used the gift cards for the next transaction.  That one included razors for Chris, wipes and a pair of flats.  Right.  Flat shoes.  No heel.  If you know me at all, you know I ADORE heels.  ADORE.  But they don't work for this life.  These, however, do.  (Sidenote:  thanks to coupons, the entire second transaction, including the shoes, was free.  Boo-yah.)

3.  All of my free time these days is spent crafting.  I've been working my way through several projects but these are my latest.  Matching Thanksgiving outfits.  Took two days to finish her skirt.  He'll wear little brown pants.  They are stupid cute.  It's not really new that I enjoy crafting.  The new part is I do this instead of getting in a work-out on my elliptical.  Two years ago, I would have been sweating every free moment I got.  I know because I did.

4.  Before I quit working, I was genuinely concerned about how I would ever feel fulfilled.  And here's my real mom moment for the day...I don't feel fulfilled.  What I do feel is content.  I have become pretty much everything I feared.  My conversations with Chris are filled almost exclusively with stories about the kids.  There are more days than not where we literally never leave the house.  Some days I don't get a shower until just before I fall into bed.  I have zero clue what's going on in the world apart from what I might catch a glimpse of on facebook.  And I find myself staring at my beloved suits stashed in every closet in the house wondering why am I keeping these?  

All those changes got me really thinking today.  When did this happen?  How did this happen?  Why am I not hyperventilating at these realizations?

And there's only one answer:  prayer.  

Most certainly not my own.  I mean, yes, I've been praying for contentment in this season.  But I've also been praying through my list of dreams and plans for whenever God tells me what my next step is.  

Someone else, and likely lots of someone elses, has been praying for me and this transition.  Someone who knew me well enough to know my fears.  Someone who loved me enough to take those fears to our Creator.  Someone who loved my children and my husband enough to want the best for them instead of a a mom who still daydreams about those gorgeous suits and viewing coupons as recyclable material.

I've got my suspicions on who those amazing prayer warriors are but I also realize there are likely some praying I may not even know.  

So thank you, whoever you are, Prayer Warriors.  I am immensely grateful for your prayers.  These sweet little faces deserve a content momma who wakes up every day excited to spend the day answering endless questions, walking fussy baby boy around the house and anxious to save as much money as possible each week with those stacks of sales flyers and coupons.  

God has a next step planned but for now, I'm totally fine waiting patiently for whenever that happens.