Gratitude Friday...

Happy Almost Saturday!

I know. I had plans of writing during nap time today but nap time wasn't long enough for me to eat lunch, do some work and write.

Pumpkin may or may not have an ear infection. The doctor couldn't tell. So we're on an antibiotic just in case. Chris and I are both hopeful that means she will stop waking up at 4:00 then 5:00 then 6:00 am. And I would like for her to sleep for her full nap in her crib instead of half in the crib and half in my lap.

Although, the snuggle time is not that bad.

But today it was over an hour and once she woke up, I had the worst headache from sitting motionless.

For about the past two weeks, she's been waking up just crying. It's gotten worse the last several days. She was inconsolable yesterday afternoon.

And we're teething too.

But really, apart from the waking up and bad napping, she's fairly happy. Unless we have to tell her no, and then we're so not.

I am glad I read Dr. Dobson's book on raising girls. Helps to know they have the same amount of raging hormones from six months to about three as she will when she goes through puberty. We laugh sometimes at how much our 22 month old resembles the teenagers Chris teaches.

Laugh in that holy moly we're a little terrified for 13 kinda way.

Anyway, the time I have been awake in the wee hours of the morning thanks to a possibly sick Pumpkin have been rather changing.

This past Monday, I had a long discussion with a friend about another friend. Not in the gossipy kind of way. In a concerned for her, how can we help way.

I realize those conversations can be just as gossipy since woman can so easily feign concern to gather information. But this one wasn't.

What came out of that conversation was convicting for me. My friend has been doing a much better job of praying for our mutual friend than I. And I've known her more intimately.

I realized I had been praying for her only when times were tough for her. But not when times were tough for me.

Then on Tuesday that same friend disappeared. Something I have never known her to do in the four plus years we've been friends.

She got on a plane and didn't tell a soul why, where she was going or when she would be back.

For almost two days, we heard very little. We now know what happened and thankfully, the story has a happy-ish ending.

But Tuesday night, heavy with the convictions of Monday and almost sick with worry over the unknown, I spent those awake hours of the night praying for her and her family.

Had years worth of sin confessing to do too.

The thing is, I've had people in my life who are harder to be around. People who expected more of me, expected more of themselves, who were a heck of a lot less self-aware and who worked too hard for what seems completely unattainable.

And yet, I have prayed for them. Much more.

I had taken things in our relationship - difficulties, challenges - and internalized them. Very much a whoa is me attitude.

That conversation showed me how I had been missing an opportunity for God to refine me, to humble me, to show me my selfishness.

Of course, we see so many things in our lives as God working to make us holy. Sometimes we embrace that. Sometimes we fight it. And sometimes we are just too dang caught up in ourselves to see it.

So this week, I am humbling-ly grateful for a friend who spoke truth into my life. Grateful for the happy-ish ending for our friend's situation. Grateful Pumpkin kept waking me up so I could spend more time talking with God. Grateful to serve a loving and forgiving Savior.

How is God refining you?