Gratitude Friday…
I feel a little bit like I’ve been released from jail. I know that sounds strange but there really is a sense of relief. I just don’t think I was mentally ready for that process. Now I’ve got some time to prepare and really get fired up. As Chris would say, “it’s time to fire up for baby makin’ excellence” and I just wasn’t.
And yes, I made a list of things I’d like to do during the next 3 months.
So sad, I realize.
Anyway, I thought it would be a challenge to find something to be grateful for this week but honestly, once we got that call from the doctor and I knew for sure which direction we were going, I was fine. It was the 26 hours in between that were difficult. Here we go!
1. NY&Co pants – If you grow 6 + cysts on your ovaries, you’re carrying around a little extra fluid. The knit pants from NY&Co were heaven sent! They are so comfy and they really look pretty good. I went and bought another pair even after we got the call yesterday. There’s a lot to be said for some stretchy, wide-leg, tall pants!
2. Runnin’ – Sorry but I am sooooo excited to keep running! In anticipation of stopping, I had upped my speed and my distance. I wonder if there’s a 10K somewhere in town I could get in?
3. Travel – We’re not sure what we’ll do for the holidays yet but at least now we know we can travel if we chose to do so. There’s a Christmas concert at our church in OKC I’d like to go see. Maybe a basketball game in Norman. Outlet shopping in San Marcos! Regardless, I’m not living in fear of long car rides now. That’s nice.
4. Pressure Cooker is Off – To be 100% truthful, the thought of the holidays with a negative pregnancy test was so overwhelming. I felt like there was this huge pressure to get everything right so we’d have good news to tell. And if there was bad news, then I knew everyone would be feeling so sorry for us. Basically, everyone’s holiday season would be tainted with the results of this process. Yikes. No thanks.
5. God’s timing – Seriously, the way I feel, I know this is exactly what was supposed to happen. After the initial shock and disappointment wore off, I realized I was completely at peace with this. I prayed almost all night Wednesday telling the Lord I would accept whatever direction this went but if this was not the right time, I would praise Him for it. And that’s what I did and am doing. We’ll wait until the time is right and next time, whenever that is, I feel certain the Lord will prepare my heart, and body, to be better equipped.
Please keep us in your prayers. Even though there is a sense of relief, we still long for a child. That doesn’t change. Have a fabulous weekend! Love to you all!!!
I feel a little bit like I’ve been released from jail. I know that sounds strange but there really is a sense of relief. I just don’t think I was mentally ready for that process. Now I’ve got some time to prepare and really get fired up. As Chris would say, “it’s time to fire up for baby makin’ excellence” and I just wasn’t.
And yes, I made a list of things I’d like to do during the next 3 months.
So sad, I realize.
Anyway, I thought it would be a challenge to find something to be grateful for this week but honestly, once we got that call from the doctor and I knew for sure which direction we were going, I was fine. It was the 26 hours in between that were difficult. Here we go!
1. NY&Co pants – If you grow 6 + cysts on your ovaries, you’re carrying around a little extra fluid. The knit pants from NY&Co were heaven sent! They are so comfy and they really look pretty good. I went and bought another pair even after we got the call yesterday. There’s a lot to be said for some stretchy, wide-leg, tall pants!
2. Runnin’ – Sorry but I am sooooo excited to keep running! In anticipation of stopping, I had upped my speed and my distance. I wonder if there’s a 10K somewhere in town I could get in?
3. Travel – We’re not sure what we’ll do for the holidays yet but at least now we know we can travel if we chose to do so. There’s a Christmas concert at our church in OKC I’d like to go see. Maybe a basketball game in Norman. Outlet shopping in San Marcos! Regardless, I’m not living in fear of long car rides now. That’s nice.
4. Pressure Cooker is Off – To be 100% truthful, the thought of the holidays with a negative pregnancy test was so overwhelming. I felt like there was this huge pressure to get everything right so we’d have good news to tell. And if there was bad news, then I knew everyone would be feeling so sorry for us. Basically, everyone’s holiday season would be tainted with the results of this process. Yikes. No thanks.
5. God’s timing – Seriously, the way I feel, I know this is exactly what was supposed to happen. After the initial shock and disappointment wore off, I realized I was completely at peace with this. I prayed almost all night Wednesday telling the Lord I would accept whatever direction this went but if this was not the right time, I would praise Him for it. And that’s what I did and am doing. We’ll wait until the time is right and next time, whenever that is, I feel certain the Lord will prepare my heart, and body, to be better equipped.
Please keep us in your prayers. Even though there is a sense of relief, we still long for a child. That doesn’t change. Have a fabulous weekend! Love to you all!!!
I'm so happy that you are at peace with this - I think you are right -this is a beautiful example of God's timing and His loving control over the situation. I'll keep praying.
ReplyDeleteI am not sure from your blog, but I take it you might have had a cancelled cycle. I know how hard this can be. I am glad you are trying to stay positive. Enjoy traveling and running and the holidays. I'm sure next time will go better.
ReplyDelete