The Four Year Old...

Oh, precious Aubrey Kate!  She is somehow FOUR YEARS OLD.  It seems like such a short amount of time.  She had her four year old check up yesterday and I sat there, watching my little girl on the table, legs dangling, just looking so precious...

...and small.

She's such a big girl.  Sounding out words, learning to write her name (which is long), asking me questions like, "Momma, do you miss your grandmothers?"

So big.

But still so small.

All 34 lbs and three feet of her.

In a surprise to no one, she is literally still small.  Hovering around the 40th percentile for her weight and height.  She's wearing 5 to 6 size clothing but only because she likes things to be big.  Or more to the point, she doesn't like things to be tight.

We spent two days (because her attention span is just not that long) trying on all of her summer clothes.  Most she decided were too tight.  Despite the fact that she's kept this outfit, size 12 months, for forever and loves it.

I so wish I had a picture of her wearing it at 18 months old.  When I bought it for her.  But who takes a picture in an outfit thinking the kid will still be wearing it three years later????

What she prefers to wear are dresses that are huge.  Case in point, this shirt she grabbed out of the pile of clothes I was taking to the consignment shop.  It's a top for me but a dress for her.

Oh, and those leggings?  2T.  THOSE are not too tight though.  Too short, yes.  Too tight, no.  I don't get it.

As for Miss Sassafras, she's largely a JOY.  She can be sassy but those days are fewer lately.  And when she is, it's because she's too tired.  For reasons we cannot understand, she sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night.  And then actually gets out of her bed and PLAYS.

Sometimes she wakes us up.  Because flipping on the back patio light does, in fact, wake me out of a dead sleep.  Other times, we only know she's gotten up to play thanks to the evidence she leaves behind.

Her favorite activities are still coloring and watching movies.  Girly loves to watch and reenact whatever she sees.  Last week, Beau came over for a play date and they ran all over the house playing Jake and the Neverland Pirates.  I'm certain most kids love to imitate.  Aubrey Kate seems to do less imitating and more actual reciting.  She has the sharpest memory.  Once she sees something, she memorizes it and repeats it pretty easily.  Sometimes, when I'm not paying close enough attention, she can get herself into serious trouble repeating something back to me at the wrong moment.  

To say she is talented verbally is an understatement.  She can hear words and repeat them but she doesn't understand the meaning.  She might even use them appropriately but that doesn't mean she understands what's she's saying.  When she does that, I have to make a conscience effort to SLOW DOWN and remember she has almost zero idea what she just said to me.  

So, yes, I have become a good deal more discerning about what she watches.  

And I am diligent about reminding her words have meaning.  And once we say words, they can never be taken back.  Forgiven, but never erased.  Only God erases but we humans, we struggle with that.

Of course, I totally get she doesn't understand most of that.  One day she will though and she will remember.  A little light bulb will come on.  

Aubrey Kate lives in a place of creativity and music.  She sings and dances and pretends and creates. During bible study one Wednesday morning, I will listening to Priscilla Shirer talking about our weaknesses and where God meets us.  My mind wondered to Aubrey Kate and Rhys and thoughts of when they will meet Him.  I have often prayed for the strength to allow my children to experience those weaknesses.  My instinct is to pretty much lock them away and protect but that's not God's will for their lives.  He didn't call us to be fishers of men by sitting on our couch.  

Anyway, as I was thinking about all this, God whispered some precious revelation about each of my kids.  He told me Aubrey Kate will find Him through His goodness and beauty.  I can totally see that.  She will seek out and find Him where we all wish we could...in the good and beautiful.  Doesn't mean all things in her life will be good and beautiful.  At least not in the way we would think of those words.  But that's where she will come to know Him.  I can see that.

Simply, she is amazing.  Growing and changing with every day, week, month.  Learning and experiencing all about the world around her.  

The four year old check up came complete with four vaccination shots.  She will less than thrilled.  As I held her afterward, I told her about the shots I took...four a day...to help make her.  And even when she was in my tummy, I took a shot a day for weeks.  She snuggled in closer and whimpered, "You got shots because you loved me, Momma?"

"Yes, baby girl, I did.  Even before I knew you.  I loved you."

Aubrey Kate says, "I know, Momma."

I pray she always knows that.  

What a blessing she is, was and will continue to be.